“Happiness is like a butterfly; the more you chase it the more it will elude you. But if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit on your shoulder.”
Thoreau 
A couple of days ago, I was meeting a future client. We were discussing what our focus would be in her becoming. She brought up that she was seeking happiness. This made me think about the true meaning of happiness, and the pursuit of it. Today we will discuss happiness and joy, and what your ultimate goal should be.
According to Psychology Today, happiness is external. It’s based on situations, events, people, places, things, and thoughts. Happiness is connected to your hope for a relationship, or your hope for a future someone. Happiness is linked to that, “someday.”
On the other hand joy comes deep within. Joy comes when you are at peace with who you are, where you are, whom you are with. Joy focuses on the, “present,” not on, “someday.” Joy, is a spiritual experience it is not based on ego, but the soul.
Happiness is subjective, it comes from the outside, and it’s about the material world. The material things that may bring happiness in an instant to my life, may not bring you happiness. It means different things to different people. There is research out there that education, money, or a big house does not affect our happiness levels as much as we may think. I personally know of people that have doubled their yearly income who are not happier. I have personally discovered that a bigger house or a nicer car leads to a temporary feeling of happiness. This feeling is ego driven. Yes, it’s nice to have these things, but they quickly lose their value. Happiness brings simple pleasure it may please your heart briefly, but then it’s gone!
Lasting joy is my wish for you! Joy warms your heart it is part of your spirit. Joy is based on who you really are, your true essence. It is that connection you have to others. Joy accepts life as it is and lives in the present. It does not seek the material things to feel fulfilled. Joy is that real effort you must make to be happy. It’s looking at the world with optimism and faith. It’s knowing that through pain and sorrow we get to fulfill our destiny. A joyful life it’s a ripple effect of bringing love and joy to others. Joy is the ability to give of yourself and to receive from others.
Three things to consider when seeking joy.
Stay present.
There are things you may regret from your past. Things you wish you could change. I am asking you to reconsider this view. It’s those things from the past that have brought you here. Those were lessons that you had to learn. So learn the lesson and don’t look back. Enjoy the present, count your blessings and find the joy!
Count your blessings or gratitude.
You have heard me talk about gratitude on various occasions. I will say it again! Gratitude is the essence of discovering joy and staying in joy. It’s those small things we take for granted to we must always be grateful for. When I am lacking joy it’s because I am not counting my blessings. There is always something you can be grateful for find it!
Seek Optimism!
If you want lasting joy it’s your optimism that will make you have it. Optimism goes hand in hand with gratitude. If you decide to focus on what is working rather than what is not you are halfway there. Optimism, not only makes you feel better about the struggles of life, but it pushes you forward. It gives you faith that the end result will be a positive one!
Have I convinced you that joy is the way to go? I hope so! Remember joy may be related to happiness, but it is a soul searching experience. It goes deep into our spirit, it seeks to remind us of who we are. I believe that the ultimate goal of our human existence is to be in joy because it is longer lived and it is not based on the material world.
My wish for you is to seek joy and to be joy to others! Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!