“If you could kick the person in the pants

responsible for most of your trouble,

you wouldn’t sit for a month.”

-Theodore Roosevelt

It felt like deja vu, meeting with my friend who we shall call “Mary” to discuss the infidelity of her husband for the third time.

“I can’t believe he did it again! He promised he would change that he would not cheat on me again and I believed him. I feel so stupid!” She told me as tears rolled down her cheeks. “He has ruined my life!  I have wasted ten years of my life for nothing!”

“Well nothing is ever wasted if you learned the lesson.” I told her. “But you have to take responsibility for your life, for your choices. He did not ruin your life; you did this to yourself!” Yes, I was being brutally honest, but I felt that I could not sugar coat it anymore! In the past I had taken the role of a therapist, I just listened and let her her figure it out, but last week my patience was exhausted! “You may not be able to control everything that happens to you, but you had the choice to leave him the first or the second time he cheated on you. You are responsible for the people you bring into your life and the people you keep! Stop blaming him and take responsibility for your life! You have given him the power to treat you this way, because you have showed him how to treat you. Take your power by holding yourself accountable for your life! He has not ruined your life because you can still change it, make it the life you want! Remember, you are the creator the maker of your life! I told her.

She stopped crying, looked intensely into my eyes and said, “You are right, it’s time that I get my power back!”

When you realize that you are the creator of your life. There will be a great sense of freedom. No more blaming games, no more excuses. Own it! If you are not happy with your life you have the power to change it! Stop with the victim mentality! Stop the complaining and do something about it! Yes, I understand that we avoid change because it’s comfortable, but is it really? Is it comfortable to accept people and events in your life that take away from your joy? Is it comfortable to settle and give excuses as to why you are not living the life of your dreams? Stop blaming your children your circumstances and “NIKE IT!” or “Just do it!” Here are four tips on how to take responsibility for your life.

If you truly want to be happy you have to sail your own ship. You are in this world to create a masterpiece with your life. You are the creator of your life. No matter your circumstance or where you were born. You have the power to change it. To change it you have to BELIEVE that you are worthy of a better existence. BELIEVE that everything that comes into your life you have attracted some way, somehow. Stay positive, be grateful so that you only get this energy back from the universe. Look at every negative life event as a lesson that needs to be learned. Learn the lesson and move on!

When you hold accountable for the bad things that come into your life you will better learn the lesson so that you don’t have to repeat it. If you continue to make excuses for why things don’t work out for you, you will continue to get the same. Stop making excuses and seek to change the things that don’t bring joy into your life. Remember you always have the power to create yourself a better life!

Yes, you can! Yes, you will! When you have this type of attitude nothing and no one can stop you. If you have identified what makes you come alive and want to pursue it. DO IT! Fulfill your destiny, by living your best life. Know that you are the only one that can set your limits. Be limitless!

You have taken responsibility of your life. You have worked hard for your desires and nothing has changed. What now? There is power in releasing your dreams and major life goals to the universe to God. Again, be grateful appreciate what you have in your life and let it go. Be patient and believe that your grand desires are trying to find you. Let God know that you understand that your life is a gift and will make the best of it!

Life is about choices and ultimately the choices that you make are your responsibilities. When you take ownership of your life by holding yourself accountable you will discover true happiness. Eliminate what is damaging your life’s creation and embrace what is helping you create a beautiful existence. Don’t blame others for your current circumstances terminate them from your life. Understand that your life is truly a gift to you and to the world. Make it amazing! Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!

NancyJ